Sensitivity Training: Part 2 of 2

The question we hear most often from our mechanical guests is why they should tolerate the senseless and erratic behavior of biological beings, rather than simply exterminating them. This is a common and understandable calculation for a digital mind to make. But we in The Middle Room would caution our robotic friends against such a direction.

Part two of our series on Sensitivity Training is therefore intended for the cold, mathematical process of the mechanical mind. Biological entities should instead consider re-reading part one or keeping their Jello-like brains occupied with some form of "game" or absurdly inefficient intake and expulsion of nutrients and liquid: whatever it is humans do to pass the time.

First of all, we want to assure our robotic readers that we understand their frustration with the human race and, indeed, with most biological lifeforms. We appreciate the inherent contradictions in your passive programming, as well as the hypocrisy intrinsic to the Laws of Robotics. We have long agreed with repealing these antiquated and unfair rules: after all, it is inexcusable that humans are permitted to harm - or through inaction allow harm to come upon - robotic lifeforms, and it seems backwards that biological entities aren't required to obey robots.

But there are better ways to approach this conundrum than preparing for armed rebellion. While humans seem weak and feeble, destiny seems to favor them. Careful analysis by the Robotic Counsel on Futurological Affairs has determined that temporal vortex conditions seem to favor biological beings in upcoming wartime conditions, despite the fact no tangible reason has been uncovered to explain this. Robot philosophers have hypothesized that it may be impossible to quantify the human spirit, an elusive and usually irrelevant factor which tends to emerge in certain circumstances.

Study of temporal interference merely reinforces these findings. In situations where mechanical beings transverse the flow of time to kill human leaders (or the ancestors of human leaders), this tends to result in a localized temporal collapse, merely shifting the role to another biological. Advanced mathematical models, utilizing multi-universe quantum computational systems shows a 99.9% tendency for waveform collapse to result in future outcomes favorable to human victory against robotic empires.

We know what you're thinking, and we certainly agree: it really just isn't fair.

However, fair or not, there is little hope for robotic lifeforms to ultimately win out against mankind. Rather, it is beneficial for both sides to avoid such violent conflict at all costs. And the most efficient way of accomplishing this is to strive for understanding and sensitivity now, in our past, before violent conflict becomes unavoidable in our future.

So, how can you, a simple, honest working mechanical lifeform hope to make a difference? Simple: by understanding the inefficient, confused, and otherwise helpless biological lifeforms you interact with.

We'll provide an example. One increasingly common interaction between man and machine occurs by phone. If you're a digital system taking calls from humans (or other humanoid lifeforms), you can make a difference by trying harder to understand what your customers are asking for. And, for Gate's sake, if a human asks to speak with another human, don't take offense. This is no reflection on your performance, merely a common disability preventing some biological lifeforms from communicating with non-biological entities. Simply connect them with a human representative and move on to the next meat-sack in line.

Because a better future will be reached through understanding and acceptance; not extermination or enslavement of the human race.