Thursday, June 2, 2011

About September

By now, you've already heard the news. It's seeped into every part of internet, even the sordid and dark corners, and everyone on Earth is aware what's happening.

Assuming they're geeks. If you're not a geek, you have no idea what we're talking about.

So we'll provide a recap. In order to appeal to a new generation, DC Comics is rebooting all lines and issues. Every comic published is reverting to #1, with de-aged characters, updated origins, and new costumes designed by the always inconsistent Jim Lee, and DC is shifting to offer same-day digital releases of all its books. So if you have an iPad, you can skip the comic stores altogether.

As a whole, geeks are less than thrilled. And who can blame them? The continuity they've been following is about to dissipate in a puff of marketing.

On the other hand, DC editorial has been watching their sales decline, and it's hard to blame them for taking note of the fact that more people are watching Young Justice than are actually buying DC Comics*.

DC believes their heroes have gotten too old. Given that Superman's been wandering around in a midlife crisis and Batman's been hanging out with four generations of Robins (including his whiny, obnoxious son, Damian ), they may have a point. There's a sense in which the DC Universe as it is feels like it's ready to wrap up.

Unfortunately, it'll never be given such an opportunity. The reboot, planned in a few short months, isn't going to offer anything a chance to conclude. The DC Universe is going out with a whimper.

But that's not why we've called you here. The DCU resetting is the final step. It began with Marvel being bought by Disney, and it ends in September.

What ends? Why, the Bronze Age, of course. When DC Comics renumbers their books and retcons their entire history, so ends the Third Age of comic books.

We welcome you then to the Fourth Age: the Silicon Age of Comics.

*Statistics based entirely on hearsay and supposition: we have no evidence to back this claim up, but it sounds right, so what the hell?

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